“We’re doing all that we can.”

That’s what each of the J-pod art teachers are saying, as they fight to “keep J-pod weird,” and resist renovations.

Yet what they’re doing is more than writing to the superintendent or even going public with their plight.

Instead, they’re using their greatest resource — the J-pod mice.

“At first, we tried to sell student artwork.  Yet when a former student came back requesting their life-size sculpture that we had relinquished for a measly $15 to a local hoarder, we got ourselves into a sticky situation.”

So, they decided to kill two birds with one stone: getting rid of the pesky mice (a main reason for renovating the pod) and fundraising to keep J-pod at the same time.

Initially, the mice were sold on an underground website.  However, when North Penn detected dark-web traffic on their devices, it was revealed that the mice were actually being bought for experimentation.

“We decided promoting them within the North Penn community was our best bet.  We’re hoping an article from the Knight Crier will get the word out.”

However, the teachers quoted have still requested to remain anonymous, as they know that their positions are in jeopardy if district leadership finds out, as they recognize that they really shouldn’t be selling mice, for safety reasons.

Yet the teachers firmly state that their mice are safe.

“We aren’t trying to cause another bubonic plague — we’re only trying to save our beloved J-pod.  All the mice have been thoroughly tested for disease.  Each spend a week roaming free in one of our bedrooms.”

While it does ensure safety for the buyer, some teachers have qualms with the situation.

“I haven’t been able to present sample material to my classes, as the mice have chewed through my Chromebook charger and HDMI connection during their stay in my bedroom.  And with that celebrity, Betsey Arakawa, dying from a rodent-borne disease, just a few weeks ago, I’m not so sure this is a good idea.”

Regardless of the risks, all of the art teachers believe J-pod is worth fighting for.

“J-pod.  What can I say?  It’s absolutely beautiful.  It’s the only circle featured in the school design, adding a needed softness that will be crushed with the rigidity of the modern renovation plans.”

Renovation leadership doesn’t seem to understand the draw of the pod, and neither do the health teachers who share the space.

“The health teachers, they’re great people, don’t get me wrong, but they simply want to have their own space, rather than being shoved into the ‘art pod’.  We’ve been trying to hide the fact that we’re selling mice, I mean, they’re health teachers after all, but this is our last resort.  We need buyers, and they have to be local.  We can’t be shipping mice all across the country.”

As the renovations approach menacingly, the art teachers will take their stand.

If your heart has been turned towards the plight of the J-pod art teachers, the first batch of mice will be available next week after their testing period.