After years of serving as an unofficial wildlife sanctuary for overgrown weeds and abandoned shopping carts, the long-forgotten Rite Aid on the corner of Sumneytown Pike and Valley Forge Road is finally getting a second chance at life. And no, it won’t be another urgent care or vape shop. Instead, North Penn’s very own Cookie Corner 2.0 is set to move in.

Gone are the towering shelves of discount shampoo and questionably priced greeting cards; replacing them will be a state-of-the-art cookie oven designed to churn out fresh, warm cookies all day long. The store will also feature a self-serve frozen yogurt station, because nothing pairs better with cookies than a mountain of overpriced froyo topped with gummy bears.

But the real innovation? A highly sophisticated underground cookie conveyor belt (patent pending) that will deliver fresh cookies directly to the NPHS cafeteria. No more sneaking out during study hall—now, the cookies will come to you!

For those who prefer to eat their cookies while basking in the great outdoors, indoor and outdoor seating will be available. Students sitting outside will be treated to the delightful aroma of freshly pumped gasoline from the gas station next door, with the occasional refreshing whiff of Hatfield Meats on a windy day.

In an effort to keep things exciting, Cookie Corner 2.0 will introduce rotating seasonal flavors for both cookies and frozen yogurt. Even better, randomly selected students will have the chance to create their own exclusive flavors. If your cookie/froyo creation is deemed worthy by the highly trained professionals (or whoever happens to be working that day), you’ll be rewarded with a month of free Cookie Corner (up to 10 items per week).

Early flavor suggestions include:

“Gas Station Delight” – A smoky, slightly burnt chocolate chip cookie, inspired by the smells of the gas station.

“Parking Lot Gravel Crunch” – A cookies-and-cream frozen yogurt with a delightful crunch (don’t ask what’s in it).

“Study Hall Surprise” – A mystery-flavored cookie that tastes different every time, much like your grades.

“We’re thrilled to be repurposing this long forgotten pharmacy into something that truly benefits the community—because if there’s one thing North Penn students need, it’s easier access to sugar,” says architect Mr. Mac O. Roon, who reportedly came up with the conveyor belt idea after binge-watching too many episodes of Shark Tank.

Construction is expected to begin whenever we get around to it, with a grand opening scheduled for “soon-ish.” Until then, students are encouraged to start brainstorming their best cookie and froyo flavor ideas. Who knows? Your questionable food combo could be the next big hit!