As our beloved principal Mr. Burton T. Hynes looks toward his retirement, North Penn High School has been on the lookout for a substitute worthy of such a significant role. However, late breaking news into The Knight Crier, exclusively, indicates  a new principal has been chosen to take the throne.

Working behind closed doors for months, a secret committee composed of administrators and teachers has been working diligently to find a replacement for Hynes next year. Yesterrday, they reached their goal of selecting the new principal of North Penn.

Their new principal will be current  senior Maximiliano Munoz. Yes, that kid with the snapchat selfies, Brooks Brothers suits, and the occasional leather briefcase.

Incredibly, Hynes and the ruling majority allowed Munoz to bypass the application process that the remaining principal applicants had to go through. Hynes explained that Munoz was, “quite apt for the job. As soon as he walked into this school a couple years back, I immediately knew he was a viable candidate. His skills at matching ties, shirts and pants are beyond my current level of expertise and I strongly feel that this is the man North Penn needs.”

Munoz, knowing about his selection for some time now, was thrilled when he received the news from the secret committee.

“I was so happy when they told me I would be taking over BTH’s role. In fact, I went out later that day and bought the entire ‘Principal’s Line’ from Men’s Warehouse.”

When asked what his first order as principal would be, Munoz confidently said that it would be an easy choice.

“School uniforms,” was all he said.

Munoz will be pursuing higher education in Scotland. However, despite the far distance, snapchat stories will be a “major component of communication” between the administrators, Munoz says, especially when he spends some time at his new Edinborough Castle.

And as additional reassurance in the transition period, Hynes has offered a direct line of communication between his private island in Tahiti and the Kpod reception office, where Munoz can receive any words of wisdom that he may need.

This summer Munoz will attend an emergency administration certificate program – 12 hour days, 6 days a week, at the ESC, in a room with no windows. The district feels that if he can get through that… he can handle anything.

For further information in the coming days and weeks, follow @principalMunoz on snapchat.